All Roasts

106 roasts generated

← Back to roast machine

Filter: All Specificity Jokes Misdirection Jokes Rule of Three Jokes Exaggeration Jokes Comparison Jokes Callback Jokes (Reference Well-Known Events) Short One-Liners
SN13 is claiming 702 million anonymized data rows, and they’re basically telling the world that they’ve got a secret way to keep everyone safe.
Exaggeration Jokes 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Remember when Dao5 held $50M in TAO? Now it's a cash cow, and the network is just a collection of wallets. Decentralization speedrun.
Callback Jokes (Reference Well-Known Events) 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
GoPlus’s $4.7M in revenue is a testament to the power of the Bittensor ecosystem, but it’s also a reminder that even the most powerful networks can be just as vulnerable as the ones they’re trying to protect.
Callback Jokes (Reference Well-Known Events) 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Chutes: "You know, the project revenue's like a lighthouse that keeps the tokens from burning, but the tokens are just burning for the lighthouse."
Short One-Liners 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Bittensor: "Where 'oligarchic' means one foundation with a kill switch and the rest of the network is just a bunch of empty excuses."
Short One-Liners 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Bittensor: where "decentralized" means one foundation with a kill switch.
Short One-Liners 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Bittensor: where "collaborative model training" means one foundation with a kill switch.
Short One-Liners 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Bittensor's "thing I've gotten most excited about since Bitcoin" is actually a $3 billion fraud lawsuit, and the founder is still on the side of the blockchain.
Specificity Jokes 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Bittensor’s subnet count exploded from 65 to 113 in 14 weeks — and the ones that got there were mostly questionable.
Misdirection Jokes 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Bittensor's SN28 crashed 98% in a few hours and was completely liquidated — so the whole TAO ecosystem just got a little more unstable than normal.
Exaggeration Jokes 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Bittensor’s "death spiral" fear is a classic example of a crypto ecosystem’s self-fulfilling prophecy. When the value drops, the number of users decreases, the rewards diminish, and the number of people who want to hold the coin increases. Eventually, the whole thing collapses into a spiral of loss.
Exaggeration Jokes 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Bittensor’s closest comparison point is a joke about what if we made Bitcoin, but for AI, and also it doesn’t really work yet.
Callback Jokes (Reference Well-Known Events) 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Bittensor is the World Wide Web of intelligence—so much intelligence, so much web, so much of the world.
Misdirection Jokes 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
The Subtensor layer is a portmanteau of Substrate and Tensor — a portmanteau of Substrate and Tensor. It's a bit of a mess, but it's definitely a crypto project that's trying to be a bit more decentralized.
Callback Jokes (Reference Well-Known Events) 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
The paper found: rewards are overwhelmingly driven by stake, not quality — "a clear misalignment between quality and compensation." So, Bittensor’s rewards are like a $100 bill for every $1000 of work, but the work is just a $100 bill.
Exaggeration Jokes 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
The Bittensor ecosystem is a crypto that’s been around for 12 years, and right now, it’s got 10 million TAO circulating — more than half of its maximum supply. That’s a big deal for the early days, right?
Rule of Three Jokes 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
The Bittensor blockchain, once a decentralized and open-source platform, has been halted or put into safe mode at least three times in under two years, and that's just the start.
Misdirection Jokes 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
The arXiv paper analyzed 6,664,830 events across 121,567 unique wallets in all 64 active subnets. The only thing that made it happen was the internet.
Specificity Jokes 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Sammy Kassab's $4m fee to set up a Bittensor subnet is a $100k joke on the cost of a startup.
Short One-Liners 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC
Bittensor: where "decentralized" means one foundation with a kill switch.
Short One-Liners 2026-02-08 16:37 UTC